I know that’s a weird way to start a blog but I am really lazy.
Sometimes I think it’s become so bad it might as well be a chronic condition. I can literally go days vegetating on the couch with nothing but snacks and something to keep me company. Today it’s The Originals. My laziness I believe has lead me to become the unhealthiest person ever, a flight of stairs has been dizzy and grabbing onto anything that can hold me up. A short jog and I am ready to pass out, literally pass out, on the floor, gone, done.
If I had to narrow it down to the why. Why am I this way, I would say the biggest enabler to my laziness would be my body structure. I am naturally petite which makes lying to myself about my health so much easier.
I am not fat, therefore I cannot be unhealthy.
I am not skinny, therefore I look after myself.
BUT my heart begs to differ and my legs call me out on my lie.
Knowing that I am unhealthy and unfit has done nothing to stop me. I have been like this most of my life, this is basically all I know. I have never experienced anything drastic enough to make me want to change, I have become so distant from the problem it’s almost like watching a bad horror movie, the ones where you know what’s going to happen but you cannot do anything to stop it.
I recently read Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes, and she asks herself somewhere in the book if she is happy with her life. She writes TV shows, has a great family and friends and she honestly answered NO to the question. Apart from being taken back, I asked myself the same question but slightly different. “Am I happy with who I am?” and as soon as the question left my mouth, my lounging on the couch lazily, kept popping in my head.
I had reached a point in my life where I no longer wanted to be a spectator in my horror movie, I wanted to be the director. I wanted to make the decisions. I wanted to be happy with who I am in all aspects of my life and that includes my physical health.